When following them into a lizard hole is NOT an alternative
October 31, 2008 by ImanK
I received a flyer in my email inbox last week notifying me there is an October fest gathering for children at a mosque. The day? October 31. The colour of the flyer? Orange. Some of the activities? Games, sports, giving out candy.
What comes to mind? A usual kids’ festival at a mosque… or Halloween?
It’s interesting to see the different ways Muslims deal with non-Islamic holidays. No doubt, this is a real problem because Muslim children are exposed to it, whether we like it or not. You can’t just pretend the problem doesn’t exist.
But, what’s the best way to deal with it?
Before I tell you, watch this commercial:
Some say, you must have an alternative. Others say you must teach your children that haram is haram and avoid the event altogether. I say, both.
I wholeheartedly agree with filling the gap. Your child doesn’t live in a vacuum. You can’t expect your child to go to school and avoid being teased because he’s the only kid in the class that doesn’t have candy or doesn’t have a scary story the night before about his trick-or-treating… BUT
… and this is a big BUT…
What’s worse is to allow your child to believe that he can participate in a haram event by playing with the words a little and just changing the name.
It’s not Halloween, it’s October Fest.
It’s not trick-or-treating, it’s getting loads of candy.
It’s not dressing up in costumes, it’s face painting.
Is this the method the prophet (peace be upon him) taught us? Did he celebrate the holidays of the Jews and Christians but change the name around? Or did he (pbuh) advise us to do the OPPOSITE to the point that the Jews said, “Muhammed does the opposite of every little thing we do.”
Why do Muslims have to always be followers? When are we going to get rid of our inferiority complex and let others follow us?
Narrated Abu Sa’id al-Khudri, the Prophet (pbuh) said, “You will follow the ways of those nations who were before you, span by span and cubit by cubit (i.e., inch by inch) so much so that even if they entered a hole of a mastigure [lizard], you would follow them.” We said, “O Allah’s Apostle! (Do you mean) the Jews and the Christians?” He said, “Whom else?”
If you really think that children will not connect “alternative” activities to the actual event, think again. If this doesn’t give the message that Muslims are inferior and we need to be followers, think once more.
This is a great article sister Iman. Unfortunately if we don’t adhere to the Quran and Sahih Sunah of our Beloved Prophet, then we are doomed.
Allah Almighty Said:
O you who believe! Enter perfectly in Islâm (by obeying all the rules and regulations of the Islâmic religion) and follow not the footsteps of Shaitân (Satan). Verily! He is to you a plain enemy (Quran 2:208)
Greek translation:
Ω ! Σεις που πιστεύετε! Ασπαστείτε(ολοκληρωτικά)
όλοι τον Ισλαμισμό. Και μην ακολουθείτε
τα βήματα του Σατανά, γιατί είναι
αναγνωρισμένος εχθρός σας. ( Κοράνι 2:208)
Fantastic article Iman, I couldn’t have said it better. No wonder we aren’t raising the likes of Khalid bin Walid, Umar bin Khatab, Az-Zoubir. We are too busy teaching our children to find the EASY WAY OUT of everything instead of BUILDING TOUGH characters who are not scared to say something is haram.
Salam aleykum wa rahmatullahi wa barakatuh.
It’s indeed exactly what you said sister, an inferiority complex. Even the “apologetic” scholars of Islam and so on, I mean, why should we ask for apologies for something we did not do in the first place? We should tell them straight forward to stop acting like children (the Christians mostly) and just stand up for that which we have a right over, and that is living without being oppressed (meaning, without being tyrannized about these terrorist attacks and whatever else).
I know this topic creating some stir for others. My point of of these type of events is that it all leads to inferiority complex and ma sha Allah for those who left a comment, you agree with me.
This is a much bigger issue that plagues our ummah.
Yasmin, Br. Ahmed and Br. Amir, very good points. Also, Br. Amir, I, too, had that question a while ago about the title “apologetics” that I asked Br. Ahmed because although in the truest definition dating back to Greek roots is fine, when you say it in English, there is a connotation that we have to apologize for our religion, putting us on the defensive instead of the offensive.
I guess theologians and scholars understand the term in the pure form but as a layman, I understand it in the other way with the negative connotation.
Jazakallahu Khairun
Nicely put!
Assalamu alaikum,
Very well stated Iman, mashaAllah!
I believe that instilling a strong Muslim identity in our children has to start from day one (or even before!), if we want to be successful.
May Allah help us all to do this. Ameen.
Having said that, there are many Muslim children who don’t have this upbringing and we must come up with a suitable way to help them too.
May Allah allow us all to work together to do this. Ameen
Apologists are authors, writers, editors of scientific logs or academic journals, and leaders known for taking on the points in arguments, conflicts or positions that are either placed under popular scrutinies or viewed under persecutory examinations. The term comes from the Greek word apologia (απολογία), meaning a speaking in defense.( http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Apologetics)
I dont think that the above definition is bad for a Muslim, quite the opposite, it is an honor. The Quran is full of “apologetic” statements meaning defending the Prophet and Islam.
I believe that the inferiority complex comes from being quite in front of an accusation made by kafirs against Islam. It is our obligation to explain Islam and defend it. The best offense is the defence.
“The best offense is the defence. ”
You reminded me of a quote that I heard,
“The best defense is often a well-calculated offense.”
Very nice points,
These fests come from ages before christianity, their roots come from older religions, but kept alive for some reasons. That is why I loved Islam, because it was freed from any bond with uknown mysteries that were brought to us as fests to pass through the generations. We don’t have Halloween in Greece but we have Theofania me Kallikatzarous, it is the same basis.
I would say to take the children’s side. All they know that these are fests, happy time for children, a chance to play to laugh, to amuse themselves, and you know well that childern need desperately some fun especially those who live in our huge cities.
So my suggestion is to offer them our nice chances for fun, organizing more children festivals, taking our children more out of the house, sacrifising of our “valuable working time”, show them that we can be also more fun and religious, so these fests like Haloween will become less and less significant to their eyes, and not a forbidden sin that naturally attracts them.
If we have no alternative to give to our children why should they lose their chance to play? What do you think?
“If we have no alternative to give to our children why should they lose their chance to play? What do you think? ”
Thanks for your comment, Anna. We definitely should have an alternative. The question is, which is the best method to go about this? We have clear ahadith stating to warn us against imitating the kuffar in things that they are known for (ex. their holidays etc.).
Instead of creating a similar event on the same day to curb the actual event, why not be proactive and educate our community on the pagan ideas of these holidays.
It’s not a problem to take your kids out for fun and festivities, but why not regularly throughout the year instead of specifying the exact same day you are trying to stay away from imitating in the first place?
I absolutely agree, the date is not significant, I did not mean to have other activities at the same dates with others’ holidays. All I mean is not to wait for special dates to make our children happy. This is a very good chance to improve ourselves as parents living Islam, showing the world our way of living. But without giving too much credit to the others’ celebrations, either positive either negative. All these need more effort from the muslim parents, but it is worth it.